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Character

Kahori Harukawa

The White

Coeurl [Crystal]

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The Legend Of Kahori The Frog

Public
All right, folks, it's time. Sit back in your easy chair, relax, go munch on some bread, and allow me to tell you the story. This is the story of a unassuming adventurer that turned into one of the most stereotypical out-of-nowhere freaks of nature Eorzea has ever known. This is the story of one woman, who dared to go beyond and befriend a beastman tribe not of this star, but one who would be instrumental in being instrumental. Hearken, to the story of...Kahori The Frog.

Now, young Kahori, a proud mother and aunt, young at heart but a proud adult of twenty-something summers, was an adventurer making her name on the Source. Yes, with long black hair, balmy grey eyes, a hairband of resolve, and an athletic build that came from surfing the Ruby Sea and doing squats after squats, before and after duties hither and thither, Kahori wanted to make a living for her and her husband, the ever dashing and lasciviously lecherous Lalafell named Bongaboi Pangyatoy, he, the Gift that Keeps On Giving.

Kahori was a proud Hyur (and occasional Lalafell and Viera) that hunted, crafted, and gathered many things. She befriended many people and beastmen and her laugh and camaraderie was world-wise, to no surprise. One of the beastmen tribes she befriended was none other than the Ondo of the Tempest. Akin to the Sahagin of Western La Noscea, their most feared creature, drawn to Sanguine Coral was the beast Archaeotania.

One day, Kahori took her gun, Ferdinand Lawmanzano, the Gun for All Nations, into the depths of the Swallowed Spire to face off against Archaotania. She took her lumps, but rose up stronger than ever, channeling the rage and sorrow of her alter ego, Yotsuyu goe Brutus, her dark and deadly spirit fusing with her reconcilation and redemption principles to slay the beast once more. Off to Eulmore, the sister city of the Crystarium where Lord Mayor Chai-Nuzz and first lady Dulia-Chai awaited, the lord mayor's right hand man Kai-Shirr offering a congratulatory toast in the shade.

Thus did Kahori turn her tokens in to the benevolent Fathard, where she was given a curious garment called a Toad Suit. Curious enough, that Kahori would take a pot of pastel pink dye (pastel pink was her main color of choice, you see), dye the garment and place it in the glamour dresser back in her home city of Kugane, not too far from her humble apartment in Shirogane. When she applied the glamour with her Toad Head, she underwent a transformation.

She began to touch and grab herself and in the process...put whatever was left of her modesty-AND HER SANITY-on the shelf. If I do say so myself.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!" she moaned orgasmically like a weeberal degenerate nerd of word, the powerful, potentful garments invoking tingly, pleasant sensations that awoke a new persona to her complex state of mind. As she thrashed her head back in a pronounced climax of triumph she had become a new being reborn. Infused with the trickery of the Fuath of Il Mehg, now she stood tall and had become...the one...the only...Kahori The Frog. And thus, the Legend began.

There are many tall tales of what Kahori the Frog has done far and wide. Some say she is like Mustadio Bunansa. She once said to her allies of the Okami Rojo fold, "I never miss...while taking the piss." Oft, she would take the words from one celebrated fiend and reinvent it into a maxim reborn. Other times, she could be seen in a different shade in the Diadem, of the Sea of Clouds, plodding with her hatchet, her scythe, her pickaxe, and her sledgehammer, chipping at rocks, gathering greens and flora, sometimes firing her Augur she calls Angelo Montoya at unprovoked monsters. Then she would turn them in to get scrips and purchase more dyes for her own devious choosing.

But the one story the folks in the know talk about these days is her deathly stack of Triple Triad cards she simply calls, "Three Star." Now, on paper, it is just an average stack. Nothing to see here. But if the numbers are not in your favor, the combo of Haurchefant, Estinien, Lucia, Cirina and Sadu will put you to sleep.

"There she was, dressed in her horrifying getup, and when she unloaded Three Star, it was over for me," said Odin Featherfall (also known as Viktor Utlagi), the Lord of the Craftnarok, a licensed Saint of the Firmament as a Weaver of Doom. "I could only watch in horror as Kahori placed Estinien in the bottom left corner. Gods smite me for a fool, I could never win against a frog like that! Oh, cursed fate! Oh, heavens, heavens, take me!"

"By the gods, I never saw a stack that monstrous, that deadly," said Ramza Boi, a world-wise all-purpose adventurer and noted curator of Okami Rojo free company's principles. "And it was only three stars! Imagine what it would be to take on her strongest stack. I want to cry in a corner. Excuse me."

"As soon as I saw her register for this tournament and I faced her...I knew this was a done deal," said the head of the free company, the boss man Dreaxyl Novablade. "To see Estinien and Lucia guard the corner and Sadu and Cirina perform clean-up...I think she has found the right people for the job. I hope that Megalotragus I sent her is in good hands."

But Kahori is not one to celebrate on achievements too much, too soon, or even too little. Victories are nice, she says, "but the most important thing is to accentuate the positive and take one leap forward at a time. Remember," she said to students of Rissai-Juku in Doma, "it's not easy being green, but it's way too easy being pink. Think Pink, or your principles will sink."

There are many other tall tales I could tell you of Kahori the Frog, but they may...well...not be material fit for the young'uns to digest. But know this, when you see that warm smile, those pink, pure legs, and that canter and tenacious, bae-licious mentality, you, my dear reader on the Lodestone, have met the great Kahori the Frog. Enjoy it, before it's too, too late.


Ribbit.
Comments (1)

Bongaboi Pangyatoy

Coeurl [Crystal]

Cool story Bae. Wait...my waifu is a frog that could end me with a Triple Triad Stack? This game...continues to deliver. wwwwww!
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