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Annabel Ashcroft

Faerie [Aether]

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  • 13

Do you tell RL people you like to play games?

Public
This might be a silly thing, but do you reveal to people in real life that you like to play computer/video games?

I ask this because I actually don't most of the time. Why, you might ask? Simply, it's the social circles I run in.

People I tend to hang out with don't really 'play' games. They tend to be more on the successful end of life, full careers, highly educated, high in their professions. Many of them have traveled, seen the world. Many of them are outgoing go-getters, not shut ins, In short, people who actually DO things in the world, not hide from it.

These types of people tend not to be interested in games at all, or if they are, the more simple timewaster ones. Because of this, I feel it is silly or downright foolish to even mention I bother with games at all. It's simply a subject that would bear no social fruit or hooks among many of the people I know.

Now, there ARE people I do hang out with that do play games, but admittedly they are few and mainly the group I play online boardgames with from time to time. I no longer see them in real life due to me having moved away from Northern Virginia.

When I was young I used to hang out with more gamers, but as I grew older and more social, my tastes changed. I got tired of people who gamed a lot being so....unsocial.

It's sad because I DO like talking to people about games, but I also want to be social with MORE than games, something many people heavily into gaming don't seem to want to do for some reason.

Eventually I stopped trying and focused more on socializing more with non gaming people. This unfortunately made me to be even more frustrated trying to talk to gamers as their lack of social skills was even more blatant. So I rarely bother to try in real life anymore, preferring to be the 'hidden' gamer.

Do I 'mind' it? Honestly, not really. It's nice having adult conversations about adult subjects. It's fun listening to various world topics and being valued for your opinion. Learning about new things broadens the mind and gives one a more worldly view. Plus it allows me to be humorous and witty with others, and I do like to make people laugh. People with broader knowledge seem to get the quips more.

Also, age. I am not young and older people more often than not tend to cut down if not outright abandon gaming for more 'adult' pursuits. Even though gaming IS more mainstream these days, (so the internet says), I assure you this is really NOT the case in the real world of meeting people and socializing in most venues as an older person. Younger gatherings, maybe. Older gatherings, um.....no.

So nowadays, any 'gaming' or geeky conversations tend to be online only, which is not surprising to be honest. You play social online games, you ate going to be in communication with people who well, game and are actually interested in that kind of thing. I mean it's fine and works for me.

Do I wish I had real life local gamer friends? Ummmm, sometimes. I don't deny it would be neat to do some real world multiplayer gaming on that big-ass screen in my Gaming House. I mean there IS my son, but it's not the same as playing with adults. Oh well, it is the life of being in a country town.

Comments (13)

Lady Yuuna

Tonberry [Elemental]

I never tell anyone. Many won’t be able to relate anyway. They think I’m a weird nerd or something. Is my secret like you are a super hero that keep two identities. One is the real life you who is nobody just boring human being. And the other one is the warrior of light who save the world from evil hahahahahha.

Annabel Ashcroft

Faerie [Aether]

That is interesting that even among the young you do it, keep it hidden. I would figure that these days 'geeky' pursuits are much more mainstream and accepted, especially with younger people.

But then again I am not young anymore so don't really know, I just perceive from what I read and see people do. ;-)

This comment has been deleted.

Joe Schmoe

Hyperion [Primal]

In a word, yes. I basically tell them the truth. I'll tell them I game, but only a few hours a day. Mostly idle games & Pinball, stuff everyone else hates lol. I've worked with a few hardcore gamers over the years who've invited me to run w/ them. But I diplomatically decline since I don't like hanging out w/ co-workers after work (it's a Joe thing, nothing personal).

FWIW: Written in a hurry since I need to get a stream going. :]>

Annabel Ashcroft

Faerie [Aether]

That's funny Joe, I actually did that one time, met with some coworkers for a lan party. It was not bad, the first and only time I ever did something like that. God, it was YEARS ago must have been about 14-15, before my marriage and current job.

Of course there ARE non gamer friends who know I don't game, but they really kind of don't approve of my hobby and groan whenever I mention it. LOL

Yeah, so I learned, DON'T mention Annabel.

Though some HAVE looked at this blog to see my writing.

Ezlin Rye

Siren [Aether]

Contextually, sure. If someone asks what I do for fun or what my hobbies are I tell them that I usually either play an online game or write. If they want to pursue the topic with further with questions, then they're welcomed to do so. I am more than happy to talk about the writing, of course, but either topic is fun to talk about if someone shows an interest in it.

Bear Ironfist

Faerie [Aether]

Having an FC, running dungeons and dragons as a DM, and hosting the discord servers for both, I'm not afraid to discuss my gaming, as I'm a manager in all aspects of my life. People who don't game or roleplay or engage in some kind of creative outlet tend to bore me.

Chlordia Zepoxide

Exodus [Primal]

Travelers, kings, shut-ins, and mendicants all look the same after shuffling off this mortal coil.
Some of us are a couple decades closer to that reality than others. So it goes.

But, I admit! I'm very, very insecure. I wouldn't dare talk to those even remotely close to me about my hobbies. Why show my hand if it means I might let their precious validation slip irrevocably away? I think you're right, Annabel, to be concerned.

Definitely DO NOT out yourself as a child in adult's skin to them.

Annabel Ashcroft

Faerie [Aether]

Ezlin, Yes I can imagine it is easier if you are younger as gaming is a bit more of a mainstream thing these days. It's not odd to mention it and you will probably get a positive response and engaging conversation.

That's funny Bear, even though I am creative I kind of prefer the opposite in my conversations. I like listening to people's real life adventures and accomplishments than made up ones. I don't know, maybe because I kind of don't hang out with the 'creative' types per say.

Annabel Ashcroft

Faerie [Aether]

Chlordia, LOL, believe me, as one gets older, you tend not to care at all of 'validation'. I am weird as hell, with some VERY odds quirks and mood swings at times, yet I have many people who like me despite my weird personality, I am very good at being a classy 'adult' when needed. LOL

The main reason I keep quiet about my odd and childish hobbies is simply they would bear no conversation hooks among some of the people I talk to.

Annabel Ashcroft

Faerie [Aether]

One thing I want to mention; I am kind of surprised and pleased at the conversation this has generated. This post actually stayed unfinished in drafts for a long while until I finally decided to do something with it.

Why? Honestly, no idea. Just one of many early morning thought blogs that was never finished and released until now. I have others just sitting and waiting for me to get back to them again. ;-)

Chlordia Zepoxide

Exodus [Primal]

Daily, I search the mirror for a familiar, youthful visage buried beneath the bags and wrinkles. When I fail to find it, I feel ashamed to expose my face to the sun.

For some of us, the decades don't wash away the insecurity, and I suspect some of us have just gotten very good at lying (perhaps even to ourselves) about it!

Fear of judgment for our hobbies, fear of judgment for casting a line that will yield no quarry. One and the same, in my eyes!

If not for validation, why do we write?

Sugar Puff

Siren [Aether]

Sometimes. Fifteen or so years ago when my daughter was young I used to get a lot of the "Really? But you seem so normal!" sort of reactions. These days, people seem indifferent and I've met a few ex-wow players but no who plays FFXIV or even my second favorite online game, ESO. It's never come up often, though. Back when my social circle mainly consisted of other stay at home moms it was a minor point of interest, but none of them could really relate.

Annabel Ashcroft

Faerie [Aether]

Yeah Sugar, I could imagine. It's like gaming in general. Back in the 90's and 2000's, it was rare to see women doing gaming of any kind, But now it's more commonplace. You will see them at the gaming stores, online, and on the internet. So yes, people are more indifferent now.

I am not surprised about the moms. You sometimes hear about the 'gaming moms', but I bet they are kinda rare in real life. Raising children takes a LOT out of ones life. ;-)

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